It has almost been a month since I wrote my last post for this blog. It has been hard to find a rhythm of writing but I feel the need today to share this writing with you because it says a great deal about who I have become – who I am!
I have been invited to preach at the Westminster Vespers tomorrow afternoon. It is always an honor and a joy to be with the many friends I have at Westminster and to join them in worship.
Tomorrow I will be doing something that I rarely do these days – I will be preaching a sermon utilizing a manuscript that is already written – not a verbatim transcript of what I plan to say but certainly more so than is usual for me. It seemed to me that is what this occasion called for, so that is what I am doing. However, I have also decided to include the manuscript for this sermon in this current blog post. Some of you will agree with the points I make, and I think I know many of you well enough to know that you will not agree with much that I have to say. That said – I still love you and I hope that you will find it possible to still love me as my words are honest and forthright and I am fully at peace with what I have to say. I invite your comments.
The Scripture text is John 20:19-29 – the lectionary text from the Gospels for the Sunday following Easter during each of the years of the lectionary cycle.
In the evening of that same day, the first day of the week, the doors were locked in the room where the disciples were, for fear of the Temple authorities. Jesus came and stood among them and said, “Peace be with you.” Having said this, the savior showed them the marks of crucifixion. The disciples were filled with joy when they saw Jesus, who said to them again, “Peace be with you. As Abba God sent me, so I’m sending you.” After saying this, Jesus breathed on them and said, “Receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive anyone’s sins, they are forgiven. If you retain anyone’s sins, they are retained.”
It happened that one of the Twelve, Thomas – nicknamed Didymus, or “Twin” – was absent when Jesus came. The other disciples kept telling him, “We’ve seen Jesus!” Thomas’ answer was, “I’ll never believe it without putting my finger in the nail marks and my hand into the spear wound.”
On the eighth day, the disciples were once more in the room, and this time Thomas was with them. Despite the locked doors, Jesus came and stood before them, saying, “Peace be with you.” Then to Thomas, Jesus said, “Take your finger and examine my hands. Put your hand into my side. Don’t persist in your unbelief, but believe!”
Thomas said in response, “My Savior and my God!” Jesus then said, “You’ve become a believer because you saw me. Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” (The Inclusive Bible)
This Scripture – been my sermon text more than any other – my years as an associate – always preached on the Sunday after Easter – this text the Gospel in all years of the lectionary. Some refer to this Sunday as Low Sunday – many of us as associate pastor’s Sunday.
Each year – including today – I have made an effort to approach these familiar words anew to find new insight – fresh understandings.
This year my efforts are combined with reading what I believe was the last book written by Marcus Borg before his death – “Convictions: How I Learned What Matters Most.” In many ways it has been like reading my own story.
“Christian” and “American” name the cultural context in which I was born and in which I have lived my life. I continue to be both, and I am grateful for both parts of my inheritance. But being both raises a crucial question: What does it mean to be Christian and American today? To be Christian and to live in the richest and most powerful country in the world, often called “the American Empire,” and not just by critics but also by champions? And to be both in a time of a deeply divided American Christianity? . . . What might the things we can know about the Bible, Jesus, and the Christian past mean for Christians today? And what should they mean?
Finally – and what lesson is there for us in this familiar story of Thomas on this Sunday following Easter in Austin, Texas?
“The triad of memories, conversions, and convictions shapes all of our lives.”
Memories – always had an affinity with this passage because of my name – Thomas. My beginnings were among the Native American peoples in northeastern Oklahoma where my grandparents were missionary pastors. It was several years before I would begin to appreciate how unique and wonderful that was – being raised in a community where all of creation – including non-human – were considered relatives.
Conversions – the summer before my sixth grade year we moved from Oklahoma to Kansas. Found myself in an environment that was strange to me. The Methodist church we attended was one that Borg would refer to as “Conventional Christians” – true of many in my generation – being involved in church was something you did – taught that a “belief in Jesus now for the sake of going to heaven in the future” – although I was not taught Biblical inerrancy – most of what I was taught would classify the congregation – in Borg’s classifications – as conservative rather than conventional. My “conversion” stage started earlier than many of my friends because of the seemingly progressive community into which I was born and spent my youngest years.
Like many people I was taught that Jesus is the way – according to the Scripture – the “only” way – which really means for many people that “our way is the only way.”
My first conversion could only be characterized as a move toward more conservative – but – my earlier teachings remained etched in my being – so every new teaching met with resistance of what I had been taught earlier – so from early junior high I was completely comfortable being a “doubting Thomas.”
Step by step my journey found me moving from conventional Christianity to – what Borg labels – uncertain Christianity. Then there were several times in my life when uncertain Christian almost became “former” Christian. Borg offers an important clarification – the only difference between “label” and “libel” is a single letter.
By the time I married Mary Helen and moved to Austin in May of 2001 I was well along my journey moving solidly in the direction of Progressive Christianity. However we were part of a congregation that would properly be described as Conventional with a significant number of members that were solidly Conservative and a smaller number that were on the edge of Progressive.
Again I found myself questioning myself and my faith – maybe I really should believe those orthodox things that I had already started to reject – it certainly would have made my life easier – but try as I might – I could not. My seminary education strengthened my progressive leanings and by the time I was ordained I was aware that the future would likely be filled with significant challenges as I tried to serve a congregation of people that I had come to love with integrity but with a theological understanding that was no longer authentic for me – and challenging it often was!
Fortunately, over my years of questioning, I was able to find some solace in some works of musical theatre that provided substantial peace for my mind. Fiddler On the Roof – basically helped me learn most of what I know about the Jewish faith tradition. Stephen Schwartz created two works that were extremely helpful to me – Children of Eden – act one relates the story of Adam and Eve and creation – act two the story of Noah, his family, the animals, and the flood. The other work by Stephen Schwartz – Godspell – offers a perfectly wonderful paraphrase of the life of Jesus as it is found in Matthew’s Gospel – told in current day vocabulary with wonderful songs and interesting characters – while being completely faithful to the text of Matthew.
And finally – The Cotton Patch Gospel – based on Clarence Jordan’s wonderful telling of the Gospels in the language of the south with superb music by Harry Chapin.
One of my favorite scenes tells the story of our scripture passage today – the story of Thomas.
The disciples were gathered in a room – Jesus came into the room – and they believed. The next time they saw Thomas they told him of the exciting event that they had witnessed together – but – Thomas needed to see for himself – so when they were gathered in the same securely locked room a week later – Thomas was with them – and the story tells of how Jesus came through the door – literally THROUGH the door – after showing Thomas what he needed to see for himself – Jesus sat with them and enjoyed a large piece of cherry pie and a cup of coffee.
This reading of the Thomas story keeps the spirit of what is written in the fourth Gospel but also makes it very difficult to believe that John’s writing is a literal reporting of an historic event.
Retirement – though earlier than anticipated – proved to be a gift. Four months following my retirement I was invited to join the staff of St. Andrew’s Presbyterian Church here in Austin as Director of Music Ministry.
I found myself able to fully embrace the Progressive Christianity which had over time become an authentic way for me.
Finally – and what lesson is there for us in this familiar story of Thomas on this Sunday following Easter in Austin, Texas? And during this time when American Christianity – including my own denomination – Presbyterian Church (U.S.A.) is deeply divided over issues of marriage, who should be ordained, and more . . . What might the things we can know about the Bible, Jesus, and the Christian past mean for us as American Christians today? And what should they mean?
At one point in my life I probably would have responded: It’s in the Bible so it is true. At another time my answer would have been something like: It’s in the Bible so it is true – but – that does not mean that it is an accurate account of historic events. At yet another time and place I may have responded that Jesus is the answer – what is the question. Certainly there were times where the only honest answer I would be able to give is: I don’t know.
Convictions – But now I approach this story with what Borg terms a “parabolic understanding” – a parable that teaches a true lesson even if the story is not a true historical account. The important thing for me is “what does this selection of scripture teach us today – and why is it important.”
None of us are able to say that we were present when and if Jesus literally met with the disciples. None of us know why Thomas was not present for the occasion of the first meeting – we don’t know how or if Jesus knew that Thomas would be present the second time – only in our imagination are we able to speak about how Jesus came through the locked door.
And it is not just this story – how do we know that there were 3 magi – that they were all men – that one of them was black. Can any of us speak with authority about the 2 figures dressed in white at the tomb – the Greek word refers to messengers – dressed in the manner that any of the recent converts to the faith may have been dressed – were they angels – the same kind that gathered in the sky at an earlier time singing: Glory to God in the highest – and peace to all ___________________ on earth.
If we insist that every word in the Bible is literally historically and scientifically true then we have a significant problem as early as the second chapter of Genesis.
Seven days, seven months, seven years, seven decades – what difference does it make.
At seminary we were taught that Karl Barth said: “Jesus loves me this I know because the Bible tells me so” – but me – the best I can offer is “Jesus loves me this I know because my mother told me that the Bible tells me so.”
The use of myths, metaphors, and parables do not depend on historical or scientific accuracy for truth. The Bible is not a book of history nor a scientific text – but that does not mean that it does not speak the truth.
For me that truth is at the end of the story – Blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.
We are going to sing a hymn text by Thomas Troeger in just a few minutes that includes there important words:
The vision of his skeptic mind was keen enough to make him blind
to any unexpected act too large for his small world of fact.
May we, O God, by grace believe and thus the risen Christ receive,
whose raw imprinted palms reach out and beckoned Thomas from his doubt.
Amen and Amen